Harrowheart (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
westfallcorndog) wrote2017-05-26 10:08 am
westfallcorndog) wrote2017-05-26 10:08 am
Missing – For Adia
Days have passed since Khan invaded the Nexus, leaving havoc and destruction in his wake and abetting some of the most unsavory figures of the Nexus to cause their own chaos in the hours that the anti-violence field was down. Harrowheart had missed most of the initial efforts to save survivors after the final confrontation – it was difficult enough for him to return to his own world and save himself after the destruction of one of his runeblades. In the time he'd been gone they had to be reforged and his body somewhat mended from the physical and magical wounds he'd sustained. Strips of flesh remained burned away from his face where Khan's plasma had melted anything it touched, and he was still forced to wear an eyepatch until his eye regenerated.
All that mattered was that he was well enough, and with an ominous new runeblade slung over his back, he returned to the Nexus to check on the people he cared about. His family, of course, was safe in Ixis Naugus' impenetrable tower, and he suspected Isidor and Viatorus were just fine – they were magically talented, and if worse came to worst they could have escaped back to Earth... But some couldn't have been so lucky.
His first stop is Steve's apartment. He knows where to find the key and doesn't bother knocking. If he comes in and finds Steve nakedly lounging, at least it means he's safe. What he doesn't expect is to find... Nothing at all. No Steve. He sniffs the air, but isn't sure what he was expecting to find. Of course it smells of him. Is it a distant smell, though? He can't quite tell.
He steps hesitantly inside, and the sound of his plate armor shifting seems so loud in the utter silence. The strange little animals Steve lives with aren't around, either...
"Is anyone home?" he asks, feeling stupid even as he does. It's not like anyone could be hiding out of view in this apartment. "Steve?" Light, what were the little beasts' names?... "Eth...el? Bucky? Sarah?"
It's empty. Totally empty. But that doesn't mean anything, right? Maybe they're out. They're all out helping people who need help. Of course that's the situation. Steve wouldn't sit around if he knew people were in need, and his little creatures were intelligent enough to go with him.
At a loss for what direction to take, Harrowheart does what he's spent the last few months in Acherus perfecting: Standing watch. With the door to the apartment still open he positions himself in the center of the room and stands stark still, his lone, glowing eye unblinking as it watches the doorway. It's only out of habit that he draws his weapon and stands it up, the blade's tip on the floor and his palms resting on the hilt as he waits.
All that mattered was that he was well enough, and with an ominous new runeblade slung over his back, he returned to the Nexus to check on the people he cared about. His family, of course, was safe in Ixis Naugus' impenetrable tower, and he suspected Isidor and Viatorus were just fine – they were magically talented, and if worse came to worst they could have escaped back to Earth... But some couldn't have been so lucky.
His first stop is Steve's apartment. He knows where to find the key and doesn't bother knocking. If he comes in and finds Steve nakedly lounging, at least it means he's safe. What he doesn't expect is to find... Nothing at all. No Steve. He sniffs the air, but isn't sure what he was expecting to find. Of course it smells of him. Is it a distant smell, though? He can't quite tell.
He steps hesitantly inside, and the sound of his plate armor shifting seems so loud in the utter silence. The strange little animals Steve lives with aren't around, either...
"Is anyone home?" he asks, feeling stupid even as he does. It's not like anyone could be hiding out of view in this apartment. "Steve?" Light, what were the little beasts' names?... "Eth...el? Bucky? Sarah?"
It's empty. Totally empty. But that doesn't mean anything, right? Maybe they're out. They're all out helping people who need help. Of course that's the situation. Steve wouldn't sit around if he knew people were in need, and his little creatures were intelligent enough to go with him.
At a loss for what direction to take, Harrowheart does what he's spent the last few months in Acherus perfecting: Standing watch. With the door to the apartment still open he positions himself in the center of the room and stands stark still, his lone, glowing eye unblinking as it watches the doorway. It's only out of habit that he draws his weapon and stands it up, the blade's tip on the floor and his palms resting on the hilt as he waits.
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Pinching the inside of her forearm, she forces herself to calm down. One crisis at a time, Adia. "It was Blaze who told me. Right, um, right after. I don't think Felix's world is that medically advanced, anyway..."
Her smile returns, small but genuine, as she listens to Harrowheart talk about his own experiences with animals and pokemon alike. His imitation of a swinub even makes her laugh, forgetting her own troubles in the face of such levity. But it's the offer of a place for her pokemon, and even a place for her, that truly lifts her spirits.
"That's so generous of you, Harrowheart. Thank you." She looks at the three pokemon thoughtfully. "Do you think... maybe we could all visit your family's farm? They could use a real playdate with other pokemon, not just me playing fetch." She lightly brushes at Bucky's feathers. "This guy especially, he likes pokemon a lot more than people." And maybe she needs a break from Steve's apartment and the small park nearby.
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"A playdate sounds good," he says. "Pokémon," which he says like a man learning a new word in another language, "In the yard, and people at the dinner table."
He glances out the nearest window to catch a hint of the time before he returns his attention to Adia, then slowly looks between all three pokémon in quiet thought. "I know y'all just got in, but if you're up for a little walk and an evening of talkin' I'd say we head over right now. I'd love a chance to cook for you, and, y'know, it probably wouldn't be a bad thing, gettin' your mind off everything that's happened."
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Not just acceptance, but an immediate offer to have her and the pokemon over for dinner. Her stomach votes an immediate yes with a dull pang of hunger -- there is a growing food crisis on her ship, and she has been sacrificing some of her own meals for her pregnant friend's benefit. But it's from her heart that she answers, eyes shimmering in gratitude. "I'd like that very much, thank you." She tickles Bucky's feathers. "What do you say, guys? Do you want to go to Harrowheart's for a playdate?"
Bucky quietly chirrups in agreement and Sarah gives an excited whine. Yay, new friends! Ethel rouses herself from her nap, yawning mightily before plodding to the door, her way of saying yes, she'll go, too.
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"Still feels weird, havin' a sword," he says offhandedly, as if Adia is supposed to sympathize with that. Then again, she'd probably feel weird having a sword, too...
He follows Ethel toward the door, but before he exits he turns to take another long look at Steve's apartment. It doesn't feel like he's gone. The strongest reminder of the situation is the strange sensation he feels washing over him when his eyes cross the visage of the Virgin Mary statue he'd gotten Steve at Christmas. His eyes narrow and he glances between Adia and the statue.
"You see that goddess figure?" he asks, nodding Mary's way. "Can you pick her up for me? We're takin' her to dinner with us tonight. She ain't too heavy but she ain't too light either. I'd do it myself, but I can't touch holy objects."
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Sarah prances to the door and whines impatiently, but she'll have to wait for Adia to find the statue and shoo Bucky off her shoulder so that she can carry it. It's an odd request on the death knight's part, but one she's quick to honor.
The goddess's face is serene, but sad, as if she has made a great sacrifice. "She's beautiful... who is she?" It reminds her of something she saw when she visited a friend's church on his Earth. Carefully, she scoops the statue into her arms and joins everyone. "Do you mind locking up after us?"
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He searches the lining of his cape for the place he hid Steve's key before he makes his way out behind Adia and the monsters. After locking up he nearly returns the key to its hiding place before he thinks better of it and decides to keep it. Never know when it might come in handy...
"She's called The Virgin Mary. She's the mother goddess in Steve's religion. She gave birth to the demigod he worships, Jesus, and it's her job to watch over the souls of her believers and usher their prayers to their god. I think? I heard all about her when I went and bought that statue for him, but it was an awful lot to take in."
He makes his way down the hallway, mindful of any pokemon who might trip him in their excitement (Sarah...) and keeps the conversation going. "We're gonna give her an offering to make sure she watches over Steve, wherever he is."
It's a long way to Naugus' tower, and Harrowheart is going to make the most of the small talk. "Do you have a god or goddess? Someone you'd want your friends to pray to if you went missin'?" he asks when they make it to the street. "I think I remember when I was real drunk at that party we talked about... B... acchus? Dionysus? But you don't seem like you'd worship gods like them."
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It's a little crowded in the hallway, but Sarah manages to keep out from underfoot. She's the first to make it outside, dashing ahead in her eagerness. She pauses and scratches at an ear while she waits for everyone else. Bucky takes to the air and flies circles overhead while Ethel plods alongside Adia. She's the slowest of the three, but even she has a spring to her step in anticipation of their playdate.
"Oh... oh! I remember reading about her during Christmas. She had to give birth to Jesus in a manger. I think she was human, though?" She doesn't sound too certain, it was a lot to take in for her as well. She smiles in commiseration. "Earth culture is so diverse, every time I try to learn something, I only have more questions... I think that's a nice idea, to give her an offering."
Answering questions about her own religion makes her hesitate, the porcelain statue a guilty weight in her arms. She always worries if others will take offense to her religion, or lack of one in this case. "I don't... um, I'm not religious at all. The gods -- if they exist in my universe -- don't make themselves known to anyone. But my dedication ceremony was to Persephone, so, um... her, I guess, if you had to pick one."
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He pats Adia's shoulder when he catches her sheepishness about religion. "You don't gotta be embarrassed, my whole family was never religious either. Never really saw the point of it. Just a heads up, though, one of my little brothers got it in his head that he needs to be a..." he hesitates a moment before he slowly says, "Holy warrior. He ain't gonna try and convert you or nothin' – I hope – but try not to freak out if he wants to tell you all about the Holy Light. That's what humans worship on Azeroth. It's the power of life that connects all things in the universe." Well. "Almost all things," he corrects.
"Gods reveal themselves on my world," he says as he continues leading them on their way, his red cape billowing behind him. "But I think that makes 'em less worth worshippin'. If I can see it, touch it, hear it... How's it any different than a powerful mage or a... Shoot, Idunno, a tank or somethin'? Why would I worship somethin' that I know is real? The minute it didn't answer my prayers I'd know it didn't care about me. I'd rather have a mysterious god like Steve's, who's just called 'God,' by the way, which I think is a weird little fact. Anyway, I'd rather not know if they're out there or not. That way I'd have to really put my faith in 'em all the time."
He turns to see Adia again with his one remaining eye and says, "Like the gods where you're from. They don't show up, but who's to say they're not out there? I feel like it's easier to worship somethin' if it only exists as an idea in your mind. Everything's scarier and more powerful and more perfect when you imagine it than when you see it."
Something about this conversation has him especially chatty. Now and then he looks at Mary, then at Adia. He nods now and then, as if he's agreeing with something unsaid.
"I don't know much about Persephone. She married a dead man, didn't she? So did my friend's goddess, Isis. That must be real popular with goddesses. I wish it was that way in the real world," he says with a laugh.
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It's a relief that he isn't offended by her lack of religion. And, as he describes his own philosophy, it occurs to her that having gods you can see and hear doesn't actually make it easier to put your faith in them. But as chatty as the topic makes him, it only draws her into a long, pensive silence. "You have a point," she says finally. "But all the same, I'd rather not believe in them at all. Because the alternative is that they'd rather watch the human race go extinct than answer any of our prayers."
And then she blushes and adds hurriedly, "Not that, um... other people can believe what they want. I'd never judge someone for putting their faith in a higher power. Your brother can tell me all about the holy light... it sounds nice, actually. I could get behind the concept of something like that."
His joke startles a giggle out of her. "She married Hades. He's not dead, but he's in charge of the Underworld." Isis, Isis, where has she heard that name before... "Do you mean Isidor? Her patron goddess is Isis. Some people on her Earth worship a religion similar to mine. Her brother -- oh!" She stops in her tracks a moment, staring up at Harrowheart with a bright smile. "That's who you were talking about at the Halloween party. Viatorus!"
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When she brings up the very good point about the nature of gods and extinction he nods slowly in full comprehension. It's the sort of notion he's surely come across on his world, and one which he can sympathize with.
Her giggle brings him a little laughter too, and then he's swiftly back to listening to her as she tells him actual facts about her religion. And then... Isidor. Just hearing her name makes his expression melt into a stupid, wonderful smile. Isidor herself might be trained in the art of couching her emotions behind a schooled eyebrow arch, but he's not quite so skilled.
Fortunately Adia provides him a quick out with the mention of Viatorus and the Halloween party, which gets wide eyes from him. Wait, wait, what was it he said? It was good, right? The lights in his eyes dart all over Adia's face as he tries to remember. It's unlikely he does if his feigned laugh is any indication. "Oh yeah! Viatorus, he's a real good kid, ain't he? He's my best pal, honestly, next to–" He glances at Bucky, then back to Adia. Some names might be left unsaid.
"You know him? And... Isidor too?... Y'all're like gal pals or somethin', maybe?..."
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She's glad that he gets it. And she's certainly open to more questions about her religion, but... wow, what is up with that face he's making? All because she mentioned Isidor? Oh! Does he have a crush on her? That's so sweet!
Wisely, she keeps this discovery to herself. The conversation has already shifted to Viatorus, and she's pleased to hear that they are such good friends. She gives Harrowheart a bittersweet smile at the non-mention of Steve.
"What? Oh... ah, not really, we've only met once. I'm closer to Viatorus, to be honest. We have more in common. We've got plans to set up a research center in the Nexus for both science and magic." She laughs softly, a fond smile on her face. "He's a good kid, yeah. Oh, but I like Isidor a lot, too! I can't believe she's the same age as me, she's so mature and put-together..." She may not be crushing on either of the Durants, but she has a lot of obvious affection for both of them.
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"I really respect that about her," he says. "But you know, you always struck me as kinda mature yourself? Even though half the time we spent together I was drunk or you were cryin'. Maybe it's 'cause you don't make crazy decisions like young people do, and you're real aware of everyone else's feelings." He shrugs one shoulder and with another small laugh says, "I was the same age as the both of you when I died, and I always felt like an idiot kid outta my league. Maybe it's just part of bein' that age."
But, wait... A research center? Harrowheart's eyebrows lower as he thinks this belated realization through. Magic... And science? But Adia doesn't do magic, he thinks, which means...
He looks her up and down with a newfound curiosity. "Adia, are you some kinda scientist or somethin'? Like an engineer? Is that why they got you on that ship?"
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Harrowheart's compliment puts a stop to her babbling, thankfully, and she ducks her head and smiles bashfully in response. "That's kind of you to say. I always had my schooling or career to focus on, that usually kept me out of trouble." How strange that he can talk about the day he died so casually, but it doesn't detract from the point he makes, which she finds herself nodding along to once he's done talking. "On our world, at least, this was supposed to be the years that I discovered myself... what I wanted out of life, who I wanted to be with." She sighs and adjusts the statue in her arms. "But then the war happened, and... I don't know, ever since I feel like it's been one crisis after another. I can barely stop to breathe, let alone plan for the future..."
Although she has been planning that research center with Viatorus, so perhaps she is not giving herself enough credit. She smiles brightly and nods, pleased with her friend's deduction skills. "I am a scientist. A microbiologist. My ship's a research vessel, we study infectious diseases."
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Honestly it's better that Adia goes on to have her moment of shyness, which is just way too endearing. Things sober quickly when she mentions the change of course of her life, and he nods along sympathetically. He rests a hand on her shoulder and asks, "How long has your war been goin' on?"
Then Adia goes and says a word Harrowheart doesn't recognize and he instinctively repeats it in a low whisper. Microbiologist... "Biology is the study of life, I know that one." He's going to riddle this out aloud and he's taking Adia along for the ride on the train of thought. "Micro is... Small? So... Oh! I get it! A microbiologist studies short lives, and they're short because when you got a disease, you die!" For a man who's got it all wrong Harrowheart looks especially pleased with himself for that one. "Call me a microbiologist, too, then! Death knights are masters of conjurin' magical diseases."
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"Two years," she replies, before frowning at her own answer. "Not very long compared to other wars, but it feels like it's been a lifetime... especially all that time spent under Occupation on New Caprica." She shivers, despite the pleasant weather. "I'm so glad we're back on our ships again."
She nods and smiles encouragingly while he works out what she studies for a living... and then blinks and stares at him when he ends up completely off-the-mark. He's so proud of himself, too, she almost doesn't want to tell him that he's wrong, but the expression on her face likely gives that away before she says anything. "Um." She clears her throat. "Micro actually refers to microorganisms or how the body works on a cellular level." She'll give him a moment to let that sink in. "Magical diseases? Like what?"
Fun Fact: On Azeroth, cells are called 'pixels'
He'll let her think that over while he considers the fact that he was not only slightly wrong, but super wrong about what she studies. "Micro... Organisms? Like whole creatures that're..." He idly rubs at one of his sideburns while he works through this. "I know cells are what our body's supposed to be made out of, but there's critters that small too? That... Don't make any sense, but... You're the expert, which means you know best, huh?" Dubious though he might be, he's willing to believe. After all, it's not a stretch for him to accept that there's a wealth of knowledge out there he might never understand.
"Guess it's kinda like gods," he muses. "I can't see 'em, but I'll put my faith in you and believe in 'em." He elbows Adia playfully, careful not to be too strong and knock the statue out of her arms.
"And, y'know, magical diseases like... Frost fever?" He looks at Adia to gauge her familiarity, but explains it regardless. "Makes a person colder and colder until they die. Crypt fever, which makes people crave flesh so they eat each other 'til they die." His eyes shift left to right as he tries to remember others. "Ebon plague, which makes a person's blood clot up and their skin turns all black – 'til they die, of course. Uhhh... Oh! Blood plague! Makes a person welt up in big ol' blood boils 'til they pop and give all their diseases to everyone else." He waves a hand and shrugs one shoulder. "There's probably more, but we don't always give 'em names."
He raises his eyebrows and tips his head when a realization comes to him. "So you and the folks on your ship... You're sorta like the Royal Apothecary Society, huh? You're brewin' plagues and craftin' diseases to kill the clone-bots who're after y'all, right? On my world there's rules and consequences for armies doin' that, but in your case... Shoot, it's probably a smart idea. Have you tried puttin' diseases in their food and water? That's how the Scourge killed about half the humans on my world. Maybe it'll help set y'all free?"
And diseases are caused by bad code?
The fact that he knows what cells are surprises her, considering how little he knows of the subject otherwise. "That's right. The human body -- all living things, actually -- are made up of cells. But there are some living things that are only one cell, like bacteria and viruses. Some of those cause disease, but some help us, too. I mostly study the former." His elbow nudge throws off her balance for a moment, but she laughs it off, even as Bucky circles a little lower to make sure she's okay. "The wonderful thing about science is that you don't have to take my word for it. I tell you what, I'm trying to get ahold of a microscope in the Nexus. When I do, you'll be able to see for yourself some microorganisms. It's really cool."
She listens to Harrowheart's list of diseases with a fascinated sort of revulsion. They sound far worse than anything the colonies ever experienced. Not even a hemorrhagic fever ends in exploding blood boils. But there is curiosity in her expression, too, as she begins to wonder how they work on a physiological level. "What causes these diseases? Do you cast a spell, or is it like a toxin?"
Once again, Harrowheart is very wrong about what she does, but instead of polite confusion, she stops in her tracks and stares at him, her expression somewhere between outrage and disgust. "What? No! I wouldn't-- the people on my ship study how to cure diseases, not make them worse!"
And then, just as quickly, she looks away, embarrassed by her outburst. "Sorry," she says, catching her breath before meeting his gaze again. "I forgot... it's different on your world, sorry. But we have those same rules, too, about biological warfare. It's... if we used that on the Cylons, we'd be the very thing they hate us for being." She grips the statue in her arms a little tighter. "And even if we did, I would never work on a project like that."
Diseases are what we call "the playerbase."
Listening to Adia talk about cells and microorganisms brings him a little smile and keeps the conversation lighter, fortunately. He listens quietly with large, bright eyes – well, eye in his current state – and his smile broadens a little more with the phrase 'the wonderful thing about science is...'
"You sound so much like Doctor Photovolt, my brother's girlfriend – except you absolutely cannot call her that in front of my folks, 'cause Mom and Dad don't wanna think about their son bein' in an interracial relationship. Anyways, she's a scientist, too. She works with electricity and power. Power that comes from the sun. She talks just like you, always actin' all..." He clears his throat before he attempts a falsetto voice, "You'd believe me if you could see, but I don't have the tools to show you!" When he's through he laughs at his own impersonation of her.
But they're quickly back to serious subjects, and one which Adia clearly has some passionate opinions on. He raises his eyebrows and leans away slightly, but is neither offended by nor guilty for the sudden burst of emotions. A few seconds and a few steps pass before he quietly asks, "Does it matter if you are the thing they hate you for, so long as you win? I mean, what's more important... That humanity lives, or that the folks who wanna kill y'all maybe feel a little remorse about it in a few hundred years 'cause you were such good sports? It'd be one thing if they were peaceful, but... When it's life or death, there ain't no choice but to play to win."
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She blinks and nods hurriedly before Harrowheart even finishes telling her about Doctor Photovolt, not wanting to ruffle any family feathers. The impression gets an awkward smile out of her, before she looks up at him hopefully. "Do you think she'll be around tonight? I'd love to talk to her about her research." It doesn't matter that it's not in Adia's field. There is a serious dearth of scientists in the Nexus, and as much as she doesn't mind explaining over and over what she does for a living, it'd be great to have a professional conversation for a change.
The outrage is gone, softening to a lingering consternation as she resumes walking alongside him. This is the same man who wanted her and Caspar to live happily ever after. Why would he blithely suggest that she essentially infect him and his kind with the plague? The dichotomy makes more sense when he speaks to her again, and she listens silently before formulating a response.
"You were right about Caspar," she finally remarks, sidestepping his questions. "He went against his model's programming to save me from being tortured. And Julia... she's another Cylon, she was in my lab. When Galactica came back to rescue us from New Caprica, a Four tried to stop me and she killed him. Which... they don't do that. Cylons don't kill other Cylons." She starts to gesture with a hand, but stops herself, not wanting to lose her grip on the statue. "And I know that those are just anecdotes, that the Cylons still hate us... but maybe... maybe we can win this war without having to do to them what they're trying to do to us."
And then, lest Harrowheart think that she's completely naive, she smiles wryly and adds, "Besides, we'd probably screw it up and infect ourselves instead. That's what happened with our defense system... the Cylons infiltrated it and turned it on us."
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"So they're programmed," he says, thinking out loud. Is that new information? Whether it is or isn't he's considering it in a new light. The Cylons are programmed to behave a particular way... Except some of them don't? His eyelid and brows are all aflutter with his thoughts.
"But some of them... They got free will? They can save you, like Julia, or... They can love. Like Caspar."
It's strangely overwhelming for being such a simple notion. People have their own opinions, goals, dreams, decisions... Even the enemy. He folds his arms in front of his chest and walks along their path, unspeaking for quite some time. He hardly takes his eyes off the road, only looking at Adia when he dodges people to be sure she isn't lost in any crowds.
Eventually he does turn to her, though, and in as much a question as a statement says, "They're their own people?"
He's not sure he expected that. He's not sure what he expected, honestly. The last time they spoke she called them robots, and robots generally don't have their own wishes and dreams, and they certainly don't love – not in his experience, anyway. Yet Caspar did. He'd been so caught up in trying to get her to fall back in love with a man he thought he identified with that he hadn't really considered the deeper implications of it all.
"I guess I figured they were like the Scourge. Which... Won't make any sense to you, maybe. But the Scourge, we only thought what the Lich King made us think. We were different, sometimes, but... We were all the same, too? We were..." His nostrils flare and he quickly motions to Adia. "Cells! And the Scourge was our body. Last time we talked you told me that the Cylons are robots, and their..." He gestures vaguely to his head and guesses, "Consciousness? Went into some kinda... Cloud, maybe? And they came back to life as the same person. Like demons in the Legion, they got immortal souls. And maybe I figured they were just like demons, who all obey the Legion. They only got one goal, and that's killin' everything. Demons don't fight other demons unless someone forces 'em to, just like Scourge don't fight Scourge. Except..."
He shifts his mouth from side to side and goes back to thinking. Normally he'd ramble off whatever thoughts crossed his mind, but this feels like a situation that deserves some honest thought.
"Except Ebon Blade knights, like me, who got our free will. So we're Scourge, but we're not. We're undead like the Scourge, but we're all our own people through and through. We're somethin' else. So... Maybe... Julia and Caspar are like Knights of the Ebon Blade. They're Cylons, but they're not Cylons? Which means there's probably more Not-Cylons like them out there."
He points a finger at her then and says eagerly, "So you can form an alliance with 'em! An Ashen Verdict! And then y'all can kill the rest of the Cylons together!"
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But she is reacting to his words, if he happens to notice. There's a soft blush when he mentions Caspar, an encouraging smile when he makes his biological analogy to the Scourge, and a thoughtful frown when she realizes how oddly appropriate that analogy is.
When he reaches his triumphant conclusion, she smiles at him in relief and appreciation, because this time he's actually gotten it right. "For decades, we thought of Cylons as this monolithic entity. Many different minds, but only one will. Even in their biological form, we made the same mistake, that each one is an individual, but they're all in agreement with every decision. And even if they don't agree, once they vote on something, they go through with it without argument... and they did little to dissuade us of that assumption, by the way. I think they wanted us to see them as this superior race that doesn't suffer from petty squabbles like humans do. But... Caspar still cared enough about me to save me. And Julia never thought she was human, never knew me from before... who's to say that there aren't more Cylons like them?"
She keeps her look of optimism for a few more steps until Harrowheart's suggestion sinks in. Rather than give her more hope, she smiles somewhat sadly and turns her attention back to the road. "That's a nice thought, but... not so soon after the Occupation. I don't think anyone's ready to trust any Cylons for a long while." She thinks briefly of Four grabbing her roughly by the hair and fails to suppress another shiver. "And some of them still hate us very much.... no, we need to find Earth first. It'll give us a little breathing room and put us in a position to negotiate a real truce."
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"Aren't you worried that the Cylons'll follow you to Earth? What's gonna be the big difference when they get there? You think the Earth humans can hold 'em off?"
As much as he'd like to end it there, his curiosity gets the better of him and he can't help but ask, "And Julia... She knew she was a Cylon, but she was workin' with you? With your human scientists? On your side, or?... I mean... Was she a colleague pursuin' your cause, or were you more like her, uh..." He clears his throat, and for lack of more eloquent phrasing asks, "Human slave?"
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She shakes her head in response to his hesitantly-worded question. "She wasn't on my side, but I wasn't her slave, either. When the Cylons found us on New Caprica, they decided to occupy us instead of destroying outright. They brought in a Four to oversee our research. We was supposed to train Julia... I was the only one who would say more than two words to her, so she ended up spending the most time with me."
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Speaking of good thoughts: Human and Cylon relations. The subject of Julia is still interesting to him, though in a detached sort of way. He's not the one who had to labor under a Cylon's watchful eye.
"I don't think I coulda been in your position," is the first thing he thinks to say. "Someone from a race I don't like forcin' me to work with 'em? For 'em? Teach 'em things?" The disgust is palpable in his voice. If he had even less class than he does he'd probably spit at the thought of it all. "Why'd you put up with it? I mean, I get it if you couldn't escape, but... What made you wanna be nice to her in the first place?"
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His second question stings, although she tries not to show it. He can't know how closely his reaction mirrors most of the humans in her Fleet. No one has accused her of being a Cylon sympathizer to her face, but she's sure that's what some other people think of her. First a Cylon ex-boyfriend, and then a Cylon co-worker...
"No one would talk to her," she says quietly, her gaze dropping. "At first I... I was worried she would get mad. Cylons only need the tiniest of excuses to inflict violence on humans... and, um, one of her model -- they're called Sixes -- she had been tortured and abused aboard the Pegasus, another of our battlestars. For... days, I think. Just brutalized." She shivers and clutches the statue a little tighter. "Whenever I looked at her, all I could think of was her sister, and... I don't know. I figured I could listen to her babble about her God if it meant that it kept everyone in the lab safe."
She felt sorry for her, is what she wants to say, but can't. What does a Cylon need of a human's pity? "I know it's not what other people would have done, and it's not like being nice to everybody won any wars, but... she did save my life. I don't think she would have done that if I'd ignored her like everybody else."
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